Cookie Usage Statistics Colour Key Sudden Death Monthly Poll Caption Comp eMail Author Shops
Ships Fleets Weaponry Species People Timelines Calculators Photo Galleries
Stations Design Lineage Size Charts Battles Science / Tech Temporal Styling Maps / Politics
Articles Reviews Lists Recreation Search Site Guide What's New Forum

Caption Competition

EnterEntriesHonour Roll
PreviousLast monthVote
Caption comp image

Login Details

Forum Username :
Password :


Caption Vote
I woke up this morning and realized that I was so depressed that I had forgotten to vote, or put anything in for DITL for April... and that I didn't care!
Then I realized today was only the END of the month, and I started to care a lot...
Sometimes, if you bite your tongue and grimace, no one knows that you are laughing at them to their face... or their groin.
Frankie, you are SOOOO MUCH taller than I expected.
Ursula von der Leyen refuses to budge from the sofa. She's German, she's put her towel on it and that means it's hers!
Kira viewing one of the lesser known Bajorian Orbs: 'The Orb of Allergies".
Nana Visitor..NV..Nope, nothing to envy here
Nana Visitor
Kira : Excuse me sir !!! I think you left your shuttle bay door open.
"Everyone has their reasons. That's what's so terrifying; people can find a way to justify any caption, no matter how evil."
"The best way to survive a caption competition is never to get into one!"
"Goooooooooooooood MORNING, Deep Space Nine!"
Kira : Will you look at that ! Frankie Chestnuts is still in the #1 spot . Wow !! Well Played..
Kira : Sir ! Could you move . Your blocking the screen I'm trying to talk to.
Lactose intolerance... IN SPAAAAAAAAACE!
Kira: "I think I just found where that last Cardassian Vole went."
Where will YOU be when your laxative kicks in?
Where will YOU be when your twenty condoms of China White Heroin burst?
"Ohhhh yes. Yes. Yesssss. Ohhhh, yessssssssss!"
(offscreen) "I'll have what she's having."
"Look, just fart the helium out and you'll float down from the ceiling. But can you get that cobweb up in the corner first?"
Thirty two entries already Captain 8472? I'm sure that beats Captain Kirks record .....
Thirty WO ent
Why? Just why?
Sweet Prophets I'll never eat Sisko's spicy jambalaya again just make it stop!
Nose Job
While the Vulcan neck pinch is much better known...
The Bajoran Ball Buster is far more lethal
Kira: “You know how to whistle, don't you, Tiny? You just put you lips together and… blow.”
"I'll have the steak ... rare."
“Give me one good reason to not punch you in the crotch.”
"Have you noticed the ceiling needs painting?"
“If you say that one more time...!”
"Right, listen up! On the cue, you shimmy downstage 1-2-3 1-2-3 until you reach your marks. THEN you start the twerking routine. I know your Cardassians, darlings, but it ISN'T that difficult is it? Alright? Places everybody and we'll go again!"
Everyone always asks WHERE is Major Kira Nerys, but never HOW is Major Kira Nerys.
"Don't stand in front of me like that ... those DITLers have filthy minds."
"You're too tall to be Frankie Chestnuts."
So thats what a "dick head" looks like...
I don't want my eyes to roll back into my head, it's gross in there!
“What are you compensating for this time?”
“So, what did you get it stuck in this time?”
“So, what do you want? A sarcastic remark?”
“So, the pump did not work.”
“I did not know that could be an innie.”
“I am going to need a magnifying glass.”
“I spy something with my little...”
“If that is a ‘battering ram,’ then I cannot imagine a ‘door’ I will open.”
“I am not a doctor. I do not know if what you are showing me is normal.”
“What you said was not an apology. Saying ‘I’m sorry you found out’ made me call a divorce lawyer.”
Kira: "Yo, Spanky... My eyes are down here!"
“You do not get to choose death by snu-snu!”
"You don't fool me. That's a bratwurst."
Kira tries her best to perform the 'Darth Vader Death Choke'. Unfortunately... The Force is weak with this one.
Kira: "I expected someone...taller."
Nana Visitor tells Rick Berman to keep his hands to himself
Let's just say the Major was less than amused at Odo's attempt at a reflective codpiece.
(looks up at menu above counter) "I'll have a Wottalottachoochoochino with oat milk, soy gratings, tofu twizzles, triple strained with extra steam, froth & a cookie on the side."
Stop pinching my ear, Kai Winn. My pagh is stronger than yours will ever be.
Everyone has heard of the Vulcan Death Grip, but its little-known cousin is the Bajoran Death Stare
For the last time, gender and sex are not the same thing!
Kira : NO Sir !! I was not staring at your ....personal ambition.
Kira : OH !!!!! SHHH&$ just jump already !!!
Kira: "Excuse me, but aren't you from a dwarf planet?"
Ambassador: "That just means that the planet itself is small. But that also means lower gravity, which resulted in us natives evolving to be much taller than other humanoids."
"I've been a bad girl," she breathed, "I deserve to be punished."
"Very well." he said, and installed Windows 3.1 on her PADD.
"Welcome to Deep Space Tall...I mean Tall Space Nine... I mean Welcome to Deep Space Nine, I'm Major Colossal... I mean Major Kira. How's the weather up there?...*oh, lord!*
“Your ‘manhood?’ How can I insult something that doesn’t exist?”
“I don’t care who ordered it, I wil not wear the tribbles!”
“Don’t look down on me.”
“I do NOT look like Ann Coulter!”
“Explain that to me again. Why do enforce a ‘glass ceiling?’”
“Ah-choo! I sneeze covid on you!”
Caption Competition Rules: Please keep it fairly clean.
Me: (Can only see Kira on her knees with that expression) - Nah, I’m tapping out!!
Kira: "You big... dumb... dummy!"
Since Sisko forbade her to use racial slurs like "Cardy" and "spoon-head", Kira is at a loss what to call Cardassians.
"People look up to me because I'm an officer."
"People look up to you because you got shin extensions."
"And another thing! I'm second in command around here - I demand to be paid as much as a man in the same position!"
"We don't pay the men at all. Or the women. We're Starfleet."
"Then I retract my complaint!"
Ursula von der Leyen explains why she can't get enough vaccines for the EU.
Kira: "Jeez! Sweet mother of the Emissary... The Orb of Proctology stings!
Still can't whistle
Every time Kira gets angry, Dukat has a laugh.
"Do you want fries with that?"
“Stand on your soapbox all you want. I will never bow to Dukat!”
“Stand on your soapbox all you want, it won’t make what you say true!”
Kira: "Who is this Scaramouche to which you refer... And what the hell is a Fandango?"
Kira: "Jake, you've grown since I last saw you!"
Sir, I still don't understand why you instructed me to bring the knee pads.
“I don’t care if that was part of the deal! I will not go on a date with Quark!”
“Quark is more of a man than you.”
“If that is 9 inches, then Quark is successful.”
“I do not see anything worth bragging about.”
“I will not look at your log!”
“Just because you are standing above me does not mean I look up to you!”
"They've fired an Alphabet missile at us! It spells DISASTER!"
"Please, sir. I want some more."
"You know how to whistle don't you, Steve? You just put your lips together and...blow."
"My God ... it's full of stars!"
Mumbley-peg rules vary from quadrant to quadrant, but it's still a stupid game.
"Kira begs the prophets for a bathroom in ops."
Major Kira was about to bully Quark again, when she discovered that Ferengi can have growth spurts way into their adulthood...
“Zip up your fly.”
So, looking up to your idol is not all that it’s cracked up to be.
Bajoran noses...ribbed for your pleasure
“You want me to look up at you in respect, but all I see is a ‘little man’.”
"Ohhhhhh, that's big!"
“Don’t call me tiny.”
Here we see Julian Bashir ceremoniously removing the stick up his ass and presenting it to Major Kira.
Kira: "...aaaaaaaahhhhhh CHOOO!! Damn Cardassian flu..."
O face
Kira : Shhhhi.......I didn't get a promotion!
Cardassian Voles: DAMN, those little ba$tards bite!


© Graham & Ian Kennedy Page views : 68,645 Release date : 1 May 2021