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Caption Competition

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Name Caption
Miss Marple Archer's request for keeping up with the Cardassians' activities provided mixed and disconcerting results.
Miss Marple Trip; I don't understand why ALL my sign-in passwords are compromised.
Phlox: Perhaps, SeXXXyBeast38, because you use the same password for all your accounts...
Voice off camera: And your vanity license plates...
Second Voice off camera: and that tattoo...
Hacker: and using it both for your "User Name" AND password.
AdmiralM Watching people in the d-con chamber was a great way to pass time in sickbay.
Bird of Prey Phlox: "Oh, look! A vintage "Operation" game for a really low price!"
Trip: "You already have, like, ten of them."
Bird of Prey Phlox: "This is simply astonishing! It's the perfect apex predator! I've never seen such a lifeform before! How did you call it again?"
Trip: "That's Pac-Man!"
Chromedome Phlox: "Right, here we are! Pornhub. Now, where's the Denobulan category?"
Trip: "Am I going to like this?"
Phlox: "Probably ... not."
Chromedome "Tortillas? I said warp drives, NOT wrap drives!"
Chromedome "I'm sure I can find the parts you need for the warp drives here on Amazon."
MR. WORF Phlox : Why doesn't this facial recognition software recognize me ?!!!
Chromedome Phlox: "Oh no! Something's wrong."
Trip: "What is it?"
Phlox: "This isn't going to be good."
Trip: "What isn't? What are you looking at? I don't see anything on the screen."
Phlox: "Oh, the screen is fine, but the curry I had for lunch has caused a containment failure in my pants!"
Chromedome "The voting MUST be rigged if we ended up with this lousy caption!"
Chromedome "Oh man! I can't believe they voted to give us this caption!"
Chromedome Trip: "Why do you need a contraption like this?"
Phlox: "To safely insert a suppository."
Trip: "I thought you just shoved them in with your finger?"
Phlox: "In a Klingon?"
Trip: "Fair point."
Frankie Chestnuts Trip: “What seems to be the issue, doctor?”
Phlox: “I notice a neutrino surge in the hyper sensitive ray flinger. We should magnatize the containment generator. I'm also detecting a slight field variance in the revolving microfilament autosequencers. We should increase power to the ion energy core.”
Trip: “You have no clue, do you?”
Phlox: “Nope.”
MR. WORF Trip : Phlox ! Hurry up and finish your census form !!!
Phlox : I'm trying to but , your making me lose count of how many wives I have.
Miss Marple Trip: Are you sure you should be entering all that personal information for the Microsoft repairman on the phone?
Miss Marple Despite the zoom call pandemic of the 21st century, some people never learned to appropriately fear the wrath of “Room Raters.”
Miss Marple Despite the zoom call pandemic of the 21st century, people never learned that you have sit closer together, and at equal distance to the camera.
Miss Marple Despite the zoom call pandemic of the 21st century, we never learned how to casually look forward into the camera, and stop looking off to the side at the face of the person actually speaking.
It always looks like the opening to the Brady Bunch.
Miss Marple Despite the zoom call pandemic of the 21st century, we never learned how to control appropriate facial lighting.
Chromedome The dangers of online gambling still persisted even in Starfleet.
Chromedome "So where is this planet Galifrey? I would like to meet this Dr. Who."
Chromedome Dr Phloxster went to Gloucester
In a shower of rain
He stepped in a puddle
Right up to his middle
And never went there again
N'tran DS 12 Does someone have a bun in the oven?
Bird of Prey Phlox: "I used to love online shopping, but Amazon's business practices have become even more cutthroat than before, since they got bought up by the Ferengi..."
Kerngezond In all their adventures travelling through time Trip and Phlox managed to get their hands on a future collection of Star Trek episodes.
Chromedome Would you buy a used starship from this pair?
Bird of Prey Phlox: "Everything I know about your people's medicine was taught to me by this delightful software classic from Earth!"
Trip: "Dr. Mario!?"
Chromedome Phlox: "Who is the being with the bald, square head?"
Trip: "That's Kryten the Mechanoid."
Phlox: "Pwhoar! He's a looker alright!"
Chromedome "This is where I learnt my techniques."
"Seriously, Doc? You learnt everything rom watching the Home Surgery Channel?"
"Oh, not everything. Just the human medical procedures. What did you say was wrong with you?"
"Uhhh, never mind. Just give me two aspirin and call me in the morning."
N'tran DS 12 "My God, it's full of stars."
Frankie Chestnuts Phlox: "...so if you let your manufacturer's warranty run out, you run the risk of having to pay for huge car repair bills."
Trip: "Wow... I really don't want to be stuck with a massive bill... But I still don't own a car."
Captain 8472 “Doc, what kind of arcane language is this document written in?”
“Government.”
Captain 8472 When reviewing disclaimers, make sure you understand the language known a ‘Legal.’”
Captain 8472 “Doc, what happened to your computer?”
“What is this program: WebMD?”
Captain 8472 “Doc, if I am to make this, I must know what it will be used for.”
“You will have to ask T’Pol.”
Captain 8472 When watching the news, be prepared for disappointment.
Cyrus Ramsay Trip: "So this thing will enable us to travel through time?"
Phlox: "Yes, it's my own invention. I call it the Phlox Capacitor."
PegasusJF Seeing just how deep the rabbit hole really gets...
PegasusJF Look where the wild things ran off to.
Frankie Chestnuts Phlox: "So what you are saying is that Liberty Mutual actually chose a non-talking emu as their mascot?"
Frankie Chestnuts Phlox: "So you are telling me that it's been 7 months and Trump STILL claims he won the election???"
Chromedome "Is it the right time to buy into pork bellies?"
Chromedome (Janeway's voice offscreen) "Phlox, how many times have I told you not to wear your pyjamas for video conferences?"
Chromedome "Are you sure this thing will find Frankie Chestnuts?"
Captain 8472 “Doc, what is that doing in my colon?”
“Did you anger T’Pol?”
Captain 8472 “Doc, what are we watching?”
“An old Earth TV character named Honey Boo-Boo.”
Captain 8472 “Doc, what are we watching?”
“An old Earth show titled: Ancient Aliens.”
Captain 8472 “Commander, did you know she could do that?”
“That is called dancing.”
Captain 8472 “Commander, did you know she could do that?”
“Why are we watching my birth?”
Captain 8472 “Commander, did you know she could do that?”
“Why is Reed with a woman?”
Captain 8472 The confusion is real.
Captain 8472 The opening scene of a reaction video.
Captain 8472 Scrolling through previous captions, wondering why yours didn’t win.
MR. WORF Phlox : DAMN IT !!! TRIP ..... He's dead !!!
Commodore Bob Wesley Scans indicate no intelligent life inside that
climate denier rally.
Commodore Bob Wesley Scans indicate that we are in for an early cancellation.
Captain 8472 “Mr. Tucker, why does the Sub Commander have a blog about you?”
Captain 8472 “Doc, what happened on Risa? They have banned you for a year.”
Captain 8472 “Doc, how many drinks did you have last night?”
Captain 8472 “Commander, what are Berman and Bragga doing?”
Captain 8472 “Commander, could you explain what you were doing with Porthos?”
Captain 8472 “So, these are the reactions to the pictures of T’Pol and myself?”
Captain 8472 “So, this is a recording of Captain Archer’s cabin? How did he do that?”
Captain 8472 “So, this is a recording of Captain Archer’s cabin? How did you get the camera in there?”
“Doctor’s orders.”
Captain 8472 “So, this show was called ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians?’”
Captain 8472 Discovering the YouTube archives in the future.
Frankie Chestnuts Trip: "Whoa... Transporter malfunction?"
Phlox: "Transporter malfunction."
Frankie Chestnuts Phlox: "Does Porthos do that in Malcolm's coffee every morning?"
Trip: "Ever since I trained her..."
Chromedome "No, hang on, we're just getting to the funny bit where the toilet flushes ..."
Chromedome "OK, so if you have the deep pan Mighty Meaty and I have the Hawaiian then we can get the wedges and the ice cream for free."
"But how long is it going to take?"
"Ummm, at this distance from Earth, about when the series gets cancelled."
"Not very practical is it?"
"Well, we can have them at the wrap party after the final episode."
Chromedome "Noooo! No way! She can't be! No, really ... oh, that's gross, I mean ... she's going for it ... look, her hand is going down ... Ohhhhh ... I can't believe she puts that much garlic in the stew!"
Chromedome "So the leg bone is connected to the thigh bone ... hey, this medical stuff isn't that hard is it?"
Chromedome Trip & Phlox anxiously await the outcome of the auction for Voyager on ebay.
Frankie Chestnuts Phlox: "Mr. Tucker... Are you sure T'Pol uses the Sonic Shower every day at this time?"
Trip: "Like clockwork. Remember... She's a Vulcan."
MR. WORF Phlox just can't get the hang of an ATM.
MR. WORF Phlox : I see Frankiechestnuts has been victorious once again.
Trip : Hell no one can catch this guy.
MR. WORF Phlox : OMG !!! I've never seen one this big !!
Trip : Yes , It fills the whole screen .
Frankie Chestnuts Phlox: "...so what you are saying is that it's the quality of the captions, not the number of entries?"
Cyrus Ramsay Trip: "If this is Klingon porn, why is everyone fully clothed?"
Phlox: "Believe me, they're much more attractive this way."
MLCoolJ Phlox: See, Commander, I told you that tri-gendered mating practices are fascinating. Just look at how the Vissian cogenitor is able to...
Trip: *thinking* Why is he making me watch this?
Miss Marple Phlox: Do you mean to tell me that Frankie Chestnuts been locked out of voting for the caption competition for months, and he’s still winning?
Captain 8472 When looking at a cat video, make sure it is a cute one.
Captain 8472 When you are waiting to see if your caption won.

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© Graham & Ian Kennedy Page views : 748 Release date : 30 Nov -0001