| Caption |
Vote |
| "Excuse me, do you know the way to the pub?" |
|
"Mr. Scott, is that a Tribble in your sporran or are you just ..."
"It's a Tribble, Admiral." |
|
"Knock, knock."
"No."
"Three officers walk into a ..."
"No."
"I say, I say, my dog's got ..."
"NO!"
"You're a hard man to please, Admiral!" |
|
| "Mr. Scott. When you are asked to organise training for your engineers, having them dance a chorus line number along the top of the starboard engine nacelle is not appropriate!" |
|
Morrow: Mr. Scott, what was Kirk doing with my sister?
Scotty: I cannae say, but Mr. Spock’s quarters smelled like sweat and shame afterwards. |
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| “Mr. Scott, why were you using a tribble as a merkin?” |
|
| Admiral Morrow realised why five-way staring contests don't work. |
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| Admiral Morrow: "Now, Commander, was that really water in your flask?" |
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| "Och, ye know Admiral. T'was just a wee highland fling!" |
|
| "This week, you are dancing ... the Cha Cha Cha!" |
|
Morrow: Now, Mr. Scott, what did we learn?
Scotty: That I shouldn’t give a tribble alcohol?
Morrow: Not that.
Scotty: Uhura’s fan dance is not appropriate for young children?
Morrow: Not that either…
Scotty: Oh! Never leave Jim Kirk alone with your daughter?
Morrow: What!? |
|
| Mr Scott, where are the tribbles? |
|
Morrow: Mr. Scott, do you know what you are being charged with?
Scotty: I haven’t the foggiest idea.
Morrow: You don’t remember the bar fight?
Scotty: Which one are yae referring to?
Morrow: You re-enacted your brawl on Station K-7. The ambassadors you were with are all in intensive care!
Scotty: Did I win the fight? |
|
| "So are you on Santa's naughty list?" |
|
Morrow: "Sounds like it's going to be one disaster after another on this ship!"
Scotty: "Aye, sir, but I got a kilometer of bailing wire and a quart of Scotch for the main intercoolers. She'll hold together!"
Morrow: "I believe you, Mr. Scott." |
|
| “Mr. Scott, ‘high functioning alcoholism’ is a lie that alcoholics tell themselves. You will be attending Alcoholics Anonymous starting tomorrow. They have great drinks at their meetings.” |
|
| “Mr. Scott, why did you try to deep-fry a turkey in the warp core?” |
|
| “Mr. Scott, how drunk were you when you decided to cook a turkey in the warp core?” |
|
| Uhura: They should just kiss and get it over with. |
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| Nichelle Nichols: "Damn!! I swear that's Billy Dee Williams!" |
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| "My flies are undone?" |
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| Morrow: "Haggis in the warp core? Seriously Mr. Scott... HAGGIS IN THE WARP CORE? |
|
| "That's an impressive array of 1980's hairstyles your team are displaying, Mr. Scott." |
|
| “Mr. Scott, can you explain why your pet mice are named ‘Pinky and The Brain?’” |
|
Morrow: “Mr. Scott, do you understand you are in the ladies room?”
Scotty: “Aye, an' I could be askin' ye the very same thing, so I could.” |
|
Morrow: “Mr. Scott, do you understand you are in the ladies room?”
Scotty: “Aye, that I am — right here wi’ ye!” |
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| Morrow: "Mr. Scott, that IS NOT what I meant... so PLEASE pull your pants back up." |
|
Scotty: "Admiral, Our greatest scientist once said 'every moment we live, we are moving through time. We've earned the right to choose which direction.'"
Morrow: "Okay, but do you really think he meant that you should try 'moving through time' by going Warp three through Space Dock?"
Uhura: "I told you that was a bad idea."
|
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| “Admiral, what is thi I hear about your daughter marrying a chef named Sisco?” |
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| “Admiral, you wear that toupee better than Kirk.” |
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| "So you're Admiral Morrow? I guess it's a step up from being Dr. Walcott in Dynasty anyway!" |
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| "So you're Admiral Morrow? I was expecting someone younger." |
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| The disappointed father stare. |
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Morrow: Mr. Scott, why did you think it was safe to drink the warp core coolant?
Scotty: It… it is green? |
|
| “Mr. Scott, would you care to explain the report regarding Kirk, the belly dancer girl, and them being caught inside the warp core while it was undergoing an overhaul?” |
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| Mustache Wars |
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| Admiral Morrow: "Commander, that vomit on the front of your uniform is NOT regulation..." |
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| Admiral Morrow: "Go home, Scotty, you're drunk!" |
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| Admiral Morrow understood at that moment why Scotty wasn't allowed to replicate scotch. |
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Morrow: "Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: “Aye, Admiral... fancy joinin' me?” |
|
Morrow: "Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: "Aye, Admiral... Ah find it helps me fecht the urge tae skelp folk right in the neb." |
|
Morrow: "Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: “Aye, Admiral... it helps me get through the bottle flu, if ye kin whit A mean.” |
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Morrow: "Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: “Aye, Admiral... it helps me get through the smack withdrawal symptoms, so it does.” |
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Morrow: "Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: “Aye, Admiral... ye telt us tae get oan wi' oor usual duties.” |
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| Commander Scott, you are going to the retirement planet whether you like it or not. |
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| "You don't impress me. I'm a series regular and you're just a one shot, jobbing actor. Admiral. Sir." |
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| “Admiral, I can explain. Your daughter was the one to approach Kirk.” |
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| “Mr. Scott, why is your mustache green?” |
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| “Mr. Scott, Kirk is claiming you provided the ‘drinks’ at the party. Can you please explain how so many people ended up with blood alcohol levels near 1%?” |
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| “Mr. Scott, do you have any knowledge about Kirk’s recent Halloween party? The ‘claims’ of various inappropriate ‘activities’ are quite troubling.” |
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Morrow: "Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: "Aye, Admiral... but the Captain lets me hae a wee dram noo an' again." |
|
Morrow:"Mr. Scott... Have you been drinking on duty again."
Scotty: "Ay admiral... but gin it makes a difference, A have bowked several times." |
|
| “Mr. Scott, would you care to explain all the empty whiskey bottles that were found in the warp core?” |
|
Scotty: "Admiral, with all due respect... If my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a bicycle."
Morrow [Just stares] |
|
Admiral Morrow: “Mr. Scott… the fact that you periodically wear a kilt DOES NOT give you the privilege to use the ladies room."
|
|
| Admiral Morrow: “Seriously, Mr. Scott… It IS Original Series over Next Generation, but it's PICARD over Kirk!" |
|
"Och, baby! Where have ye bin all mah life?"
"Look at me, Mr. Scott. Not over my shoulder."
"Who says I was looking over your shoulder?" |
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| "A whole month? I've got to stare into your eyes for a whole month? Sheeeeeit!" |
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| "And may I remind you, Mister Scott, that THIS is what a real mustache looks like." |
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| Admiral Morrow: “Mr. Scott… If you continue with the sea shanties, I’ll not only decommission the Enterprise, but I’ll decommission YOU also!” |
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| “I like big Scots and I cannot lie…” |
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