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Kirk and McCoy are the judges of this year’s Enterprise Halloween Costume Contest. Their reactions are due to all the entries mocking Kirk.
Bones: "Crickey, Jim... Didn't I warn you about shaving with a straight razor when we are experiencing turbulence?"
Bones: "Crickey, Jim... they're Klingons... Not Cling-ons."
These two clearly did not expect the Spanish Inquisition.
"He IS a handsome devil, isn't he, Jim?"
"Bones, is that REALLY what Frankie Chstnuts looks like?"
McCoy: Jim, your jealousy is showing.
"Set paintballs to stain!"
Wardrobe!
McCoy: Yes, I know Jim used his uniform as a bib, and I have the pictures of the moment of the spill.
Bones: "WOW!! Gesundheit! I'm going need you to come with me down to Sick Bay."
Spock scored the appreciation of the alien princess. The reactions of Kirk and McCoy are recorded in this image.
Sulu cracked a joke about ‘broken hearts.’ McCoy smirked at knowing about Kirk’s full romantic history.
Out damn spot.
Cut??
Bones is posing for his upcoming feature in “GQ”.
Kirk is posing for his upcoming feature in “Catfish Gutting Monthly”.
As if his chest had been a mortor....
McCoy : "I'm reading bones, muscle tissue from at least nine different species. It's all being broken down by some sort of enzyme."
Kirk: "Perhaps this is their method of denaturating their prey."
Sulu (from helm): "Either that, or it's dinner."
Kirk: "I worry about you, Mister Sulu."
Director: Shatner, get that oil off your face, we are getting too many lense flares.
McCoy: I’m sorry, but we cannot stay. My captain’s heartburn is no joke.
"They're just a bunch of ensigns, Bones. Think we can take 'em?"
"Depends what your stunt double thinks."
Kirk: "HEY!! You hit me in the nose!"
Q: "If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought to go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous, with treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid."
Kirk: "It's really not safe under my bed either. Just ask Bones here."
Bones: "You promised NEVER to bring that up."
Shatner: These are the kids that will replace us in 30 years?
Kelly: I think my replacement will be just fine.
Kirk & Bones are confronted as they try to leave without paying.
Bones: "Ensign, as much as you'd like to, please don't fight the Captain until I've entered the room."
When Spock put this picture together, he hadn't quite understood the concept of "Spot The Difference"
Kirk: "Bloody hell!"
McCoy: "No, I think that's a Bloody Mary."
McCoy: Jim, as you can see, no one cares about you anymore.
Here we see the only survivor of an alien chest buster and his doctor. The alien embryo failed to emerge due to the victim’s enormous ego refusing to concede to another being getting more attention.
Bones: "Jim! You're hurt! Are you OK?
Kirk: "'Tis but a scratch!"
Bones: "You're bleeding on the floor."
Kirk: "I've had worse!"
Bones: "I think it's a severed artery!"
Kirk: "Just a flesh wound."
Kirk: "There he is, Bones! It's the guy who punched me!"
Kirk: What are you going to do? Bleed on me?
McCoy: He already has.
McCoy: Jim, you really did it this time.
Kirk: Doctor, please…
McCoy: I am thoroughly impressed.
Kirk: Bomes…
McCoy: Who could have guessed you would make an ex so jealous she cried blood?
McCoy: Jim, you really did it this time.
Kirk: Doctor, please…
McCoy: I am thoroughly impressed.
Kirk: Bomes…
McCoy: Who could have guessed you possessed the willingness to have a one night stand with a Klingon.
"Bones, I need your help."
"I'm a doctor, not a dry cleaner."
McCoy: Well, Captain, you just learned why all of Starfleet’s personnel wear red now.
McCoy: I must say, it feels good to prove you wrong, Jim.
McCoy: Ma’am, if you want to publicly humiliate my captain, next time let me know first. I have a new camera I want to try out.
Friday Night Foodfight in the Officers Club
"Bones, I love it when she's angry!"
Monster Of The Week #37 - The 12" Meatball Marinara
Director: Cut! Shatner, you need to town it down. Kelly, you are flawless.
Don't worry Bones,
It's not my blood.
The fact Spock could get the unruly toddler to eat with out a problem made the stain on Kirk’s uniform even more embarrassing.
Bones: "This is why we wear aprons during Bridge Finger-painting Hour, Jim."
Bones... Stoic, serious, professional.
Kirk... Spilled a pudding cup on his uniform during his afternoon snack.
Paintball... IN SPAAAAAAAACE!!!!!
Bones: Jim... Stop taunting the monkeys.
Kirk [In a sing-song manner]: ♫ "Ha-ha! Missed me!" ♪
Bones: "Ahem... Jim...".
Movie Crossover Idea
Star Trek: Alien
Synopsis: An intrepid band of space explorers come upon an alien nursery. The ever opportunistic captain is surprised when he gives birth to his youngling in a most violent fashion.
"This is what happens when you mess with tomatoes, kids. Just say no!"
"NURSE! Ketchup incident! Stat!"
Bones: "I'm very disappointed in you, Ensign. We don't use the Captain's uniform as a napkin on Spaghetti Night."
Bones: "I hate to say I told you so, Jim, but... I told you so!"
McCoy: Ma’am, if you want to give Jim a bloody nose, let me know first. I prefer to have my equipment ready for when my captain steps out of line.
Kirk is surprised, McCoy is smug, Spock was proven wrong.

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© Graham & Ian Kennedy Page views : 131,675 Release date : 1 Nov 2025