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| Name | Caption |
| Mr. Worf | The Co-ed bathroom idea still wasn't a great idea even in the 24th century. |
| Name | Caption |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Neelix: “…so you’re saying flatulence ISN’T considered foreplay in the Alpha Quadrent?” |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Neelix: “…so you’re saying my Mohawk is no longer [insert finger quotes] ‘IN’??“ |
| Captain 8472 | Nelix regrets every choice that lead to this moment. |
| Captain 8472 | Nelix: Let me see if I understand the situation. You came to me for advice? |
| DBB | B'ellana: According to our data, Neelix, you've been voting for your own caption entries. Neelix: *racked with shame* |
| DBB | "Neelix. We, uh... We found your search history." "...uh-oh." "Yeah." |
| Miss Marple | B’Elana: I know every man dreams of hooking up with an exotic woman on a meteor, saving her entire colony, and living happily ever after… but what are the odds of that ever happening? |
| FeRam | Neelix: “…so you’re saying I’m NOT going to be the baby’s godfather… can I be the FATHER?” |
| Captain 8472 | Miss Marple (left) is doing her best to educate Frankie Chestnuts (right) on his poor choice of a character to cosplay as. |
| Chromedome | "Neelix, I'd like to talk to you about your bread rolls ... we're running short of torpedoes and ...." |
| Captain 8472 | B’Elanna drew the short straw. She is now required to discuss personal hygiene with Nelix. |
| Bird of Prey | B'Elanna: "Remember that time you made the ship itself sick with cheese?" Neelix: "I will never live it down four our entire 70 year long journey, won't I?" |
| Captain 8472 | Communal lavatories may result in awkward staring. |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Neelix: “…so you’re saying you voted me off the ship?" Well (sniff)... I'll just talk to Kes and we'll get our things packed." B'Elanna: "Hang on Neelix... We're just talking about YOU. Kes can stay. She was the deciding vote." |
| drow | B’Elanna: "I'm sorry Neelix, but Seven of Nine still refuses to do the 'decontamination gel' thing with you." |
| drow | B’Elanna: "Neelix, what have I told you about using my bat'leth for carving turkey?" |
| Chromedome | "Look Neelix, it doesn't matter what you say. I AM installing a doner kebab rotisserie in the galley, simply to improve crew morale!" |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Marlin Perkins: “Jim… watch the slow, deliberate movements of the skilled hunter as she stalks her prey… he’s utterly unaware of the danger she poses. . AND SHE STRIKES!! . While brutal, this kill will sustain her and her cubs for more than a week in this vast, barren wasteland.” |
| Miss Marple | “Introduction to Alpha Quadrant Class, lesson #13. Neelix: …so what you’re saying is is that all Cardassians have proportionally large bums? B’Elana: That’s the Kardashians, not the Cardassians. And don’t pronounce it with so much “ASS” because it really pisses off the Cardassians. |
| Miss Marple | B’Elanna: well… Neelix … In order to be a member of the “Mile High Club” you actually have to have sex WITH ANOTHER PERSON … IN SPAAAAAAAAAAACE. |
| DBB | "I don't understand. On Talax, aggressively passing gas is a compliment." "This isn't Talax." "But it's harmless." "You parted Harry's hair. He hasn't stopped screaming." "Was it that bad?" "It sounded like a warp core breach." "I'm so sorry." "They heard it on the bridge. Tuvok called a yellow alert." "I'm so, so sorry." |
| MR. WORF | B'elanna got a big surprise when she arrived in Stovokor !!! |
| MLCoolJ | Neelix: It's interesting that you'd call me that. On Talax, "pe tak" means "divine chef". B'Elanna: *sighs* So much for THAT insult. |
| Miss Marple | B'Elanna: Well, Neelix, when governments take away a woman's right to make decisions about their own bodies, women get angry, very angry. It turns out that good men also get angry. You've heard the expression : "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry." Neelix, quietly tapping com badge: Neelix to security! |
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