My first story *need help*

[bob]

the first story ive been able to get from my head to paper is this
Drones
Written by: Philip A. Switzer
---------------------------------
Insert picture
----------------------------------
In a world of the living dead, one man steps aside

*One line of people all marching in sync, all going to the same place, all at the same time, all is order, yet all is chaos. One hundred forty-three people down the line one person begins to look around then he continues on his course. But he begins to think. Then he notices that the other people in front and behind him all are the same, not in looks but in feeling. They are all emotionless, all thoughtless, all except him. Then he sees something in the corner of his eye, and he steps out of the line and stops moving. He smells the air, looks around and feels something, a tingle all around his body. He feels something else, something towards the other feeling. He becomes scared he begins to fear. First there was nothing, no one. Then he felt everything, saw everyone. He became alive in a world of the living dead. In a world of drones.

[stitch626]

Wow, the imagery is very nice. Kinda creepy. I could see this being an interesting story, depending on how you do it. And if you need help, just ask me at home.

[Mikey]

That's a really great take on the point-of-view. I'd say to treat writing this story as method acting - get inside the character, and describe everything from inside his head.