Quarks Bar

[Teaos]

Ok here is a place were we can all just kick back and have fun, no official rules, just don't be jerks and stay in RP character.

The scene is Quarks bar, you can play games, have a bar fight or play in the holodecks.

In this thread assume all our characters are at DS9 in Quarks bar.

This in not RP canon, that means that what happens in this thread doesn't count for anything, its just a place for us to play around in character.

[Teaos]

Commander Teaos stood under the shade of a tree in one of Quarks holodecks. Wearing clear plastic goggles and dressed in brown coveralls he didnt seem much like a scientist at this moment.

Holding a mug of beer in his left hand and what looked like a rifle in his right he spoke to the other officers and the few random crewmen in the holodeck.

"Ok poeple, this is paint ball, we have our team sorted, the Paladin and Ravage crew vs the Daystrom and Pegasus and Valkyrie. The aim of the game is to capture the other teams flag and bring it back to your base. You win when you have both your own flag and the enemies in your base. If shot you are dead, you have to run back to your base and stay there dead for 2 minutes before rejoining the game. Any questions?" Teaos asked.

"Do the paint balls hurt?" Mikey asked looking rather odd with his blue skin clashing with the green coveralls.

"Depends on where you get shot" Teaos said lifting his gun and shooting Mikey in the gut. Mikey flinched but remained standing acting overtly masculine.

"Getting shot in a fleshy area stings but is easy to shake off" Teaos said before dropping the barrel of his gun a little and firing again hitting Mikey in the crotch causing him to fall to the ground cupping his groin.

"Getting hit in the nuts is less easy to shake off" Teaos said.

"Game starts in 2 minutes, everyone to their base" Teaos yelled while running away befor Mikey could aim his gun at him.

[Reliant121]

"ugh...Mr. W'Trisk, what is the point of this weapon? Paint is hardly lethal is it?" Darel asked, weilding the clumsy paintball gun. He looked at the andorian who shrugged his shoulders.

"How should I know? And I thought the Vulcans were backwards.." Mikey replied. "Although i fully intend not to be hit by a paint ball. If my antenna end up green at the end of this, i swear to the hells i'm going to throttle Teaos."

Darel chuckled, "I bet you will captain, i bet. And another thing...what is the point of getting a flag? Would it not be more prudent to steal some PADD containing sensitive data?"

Mikey raised his eyebrows.

"Hinting?"

"Hey! Take information while you can. Obsidian habits die hard," Darel said, grinning.

"I'm sure."

[Mark]

"Ok, this is it. Move out!" Lt. Cix ordered. "The honor of the Valkyrie is at stake here. Don't lose, understand?" His red eyes seemed to glow brighter and the spines atop his stood up in anticipation. "Team Alpha, go left. Team Beta, go right."

"Where will you go sir?" a young ensign braver than most asked the Xindi security chief.

"Better you don't know that son. If your captured and they torture you, you won't be able to tell them what you don't know. It would be a shame if you did, because then, according to Xindi custom, I'd have to eat you to save both of our honors" Cix replied. With a grin looking more like a snarl, he melted seamlesslessly into the holo-foliage, vanishing from sight.

"He was kidding, right?" the young ensign asked his teammates. "After all, this is just a game. He knows that."

"Your probebly right. But with the Xindi, you just never know for sure, do you?" replied a Senior Chief with a smile

The young ensign gulped noisely.

[Mark]

Master Chief McDuff looked down at his overalls in disgust. "I'm to damn old for these games" he complained for the umpteenth time, to the two ensigns he was with.

One of the ensigns respectfully asked with a grimice, "Master Chief, please. If you talk, the enemy is going to be able to locate us."

The second ensigns nodded in agreement, "That's right, Master Chief. Look, I wanna get these guys. They all talk smack about Pegasus, her being a science ship and all, that her crew don't have what it takes to handle a fight. Give us a break, it's a matter of pride."

Nodding sagely, McDuff replied, "Son, do you have any idea how many men and women I know that are dead today because of pride? Why, when I was still a boy......"

The first ensign interupted "That guy Noah was building that big boat to save all the animals, right Master Chief?" causing the second ensign to snicker as well.

McDuff, feigning being offended said "Oh, I see. Make fun of the old man, huh? Don't think you have anything to learn from me, huh? Well, let's just see about that. I'll let you boys figure out what to do now."

The second ensign replied quizically "What do you mean?"

Looking blankly at the young ensign, he said "Aren't we supposed to be quiet?"

"Do you know something, McDuff?" the first ensign insisted "If so, I order you to tell us."

With a snide smile, McDuff replied, "YES SIR. DUCK SIR!" and hit the ground rolling and the rat-tat-tat of rapid fire ball guns surrounded the glade, spattering the two shocked ensigns.

As the gunfire died away, McDuff told the two smarting ensigns, "Don't feel bad boys. I've been playing a game like this for nearly a century now. But it was a little different. See back in my day, we used to play a REAL game, Phaser Tag. Yessir, now that was a game that took balls. Everybody grabbed a phaser, set it to stun, and the last man standing was the winner. One thing about that game, you learned to be able to tell when someone is creeping up on you with a weapon, kid."

"How, Master Chief?" the second ensign asked sincearly.

McDuff pointed to his nose, "After running around with these damn guns boys, you start to stink. Use these things for something other than picking next time."

The two ensigns shook their heads as the proceeded to the time out box, as McDuff complained one more time, "I'm too damn old for these games.", before low crawling away from the "enemy" into cover.

[Teaos]

Teaos, Mark and several of the Paladin crew were taking cover behind some rocks and a fallen tree on one side of a shallow ravine exchanging fire with the other team on the other side of the ravine. Two of their team had already been hit and were making their way back to base, but from the sounds of things they had gotten at least one of the other teams guys in revenge.

"Mark how would you feel about a little cheating?" Teaos asked from his position behind the fallen tree.

"Considering the other teams superior numbers and position it would be the only logical way we could win" Mark replied evenly as a barrage of paintballs hit the rock outcropping he was taking cover behind.

"Excellent" Teaos said with a smirk "Computer..."

***

"How many of them are left?" Hewer asked from his position lying down on the ground covered by some long grass.

"Maybe four, I'm pretty sure Teaos is still alive" Mikey said sounding very disappointed at the last fact.

"Sir do you want us to circle aroUND!" One of the crewmen said yelling out the last word as he jumped up from his position quickly being shot multiple times in the torso.

The remainder of his team watched as he continued to jump around despite being "dead". He finally kicked out his leg causing a brown blur to fall out of his pants leg, the object lay still for a moment before twitching and running at another of the crew. Several more of the creatures could be seen moving around their area.

"Ferrets?" Hewer muttered looking up at Mikey curiously.

"Teaos..." Mikey murmured looking out across the ravine.

[Mark]

Outside the holosuite

The gaming room echoed with the joyous cry of "Dabo!" Dr. Holmes collected his winnings with a smug expression, as Quark stood by with a nervous expression.

"Are you sure you wouldn't like to take a break, Doctor?" Quark asked.

"Why would I want to take a break?" the Doctor replied "I'm cleaning you out."

"Why don't you come with me to the bar?" Quark suggested nervously as he watched the Doctor double his usual bet "I have a bottle of something you hu-mans are supposed to like. It's called tequila."

"No thanks." Holmes replied distractedly, again increasing his bet "I'm doing quite all right".

"Dabo!" the table cried again. Holmes again collected his winnings with a smirk.

Quark began to stammer, then in an imitation of a stern tone, he said "Doctor, I really must insist. You need to rest that leg. You don't want to over exert yourself."

Dr. Holmes looked at Quark with an irritated expression, "Quark, you ubisquious little toadlike, four lobed biped. Leave me alone!"

Quark backed away with a starteled expression and went back to the bar. Leaning over to Morn, he informed the talkative alien "He is the single rudest hu-man I've ever met! If he didn't spend so much in to holosuites on the ENTIRE Vulcan Love Slave collection, I swear, I'd just throw him out."

"Dabo!" the room echoed again.

"That's it! Now I know he's cheating." Quark swore "I just have to figure out how."

[Mikey]

"Jon!" hissed Mikey. "Can you flank them and make enough commotion to give me a shot at indirect fire?"

"Hell," said Hewer, "I'll make them jump in your lap. Just give me some cover. Let me guess - you have in mind something innovative and foolhardy."

"Have we met before?" Mikey said, grinning.

Mikey's team began to pour a wild barrage of fire at Teaos' position, until Hewer did the same from a second angle. As Teaos and Mark began to move for a more defensible spot, Mark yelled, "Commander!" Mikey's unmistakable blue form was standing straight up from his cover. The two men from the Paladin began to swing their paintguns into position as the Andorian drew back his arm and threw. A squeaking, furry, pale brown missile struck Mark in the chest - knocking him backward more with surprise than injury - and a second followed quickly to land squarely on Teoas' head to chatter angrily and then begin a convoluted spiral course around the commander's body.

"Now!" roared Mikey, and led his team in a quick charge, tossing a couple more ferrets like grenades as he ran.

[shran]

Somewhere, on the edge of the holographic enviroment, another struggle was taking place on a wholly different level. 'Boatswain' Nijhoff was never really that much into fights and the sort, yet the posibility to watch the epic battle between Daystrom veterans was too exciting to ignore. And now, he lay on the ground, pretending to be dead, with his paintball rifle next to him.

Suddenly, the ferret moved again, inside his pants.

"Now now, my dear little brown quadraped mammal, please be gentle while attempting to escape the terrible prison called my paintball overall..."

As this struggle of immense proportions continued, a shadowy figure crept closer and closer to him. As if the holodeck responded to this presence, the temperature dropped, and the lighting dimmed significantly.

"Resistance is futile..."

The old boatswain found himself lying on the ground with a ferret in his overall near his crotch and Lt. Cix standing over him, with a paintball rifle and his own paintball rifle aimed at him. Good heavens, dual wielding paintball soldiers are so fracking intimidating.....

[Tsukiyumi]

Devi glanced around again, nursing another drink. There was no one in sight but the Daystrom's new doctor cleaning house at the Dabo wheel, an increasingly irritated Ferengi bartender, and the two Dabo girls seemingly attached to the aforementioned doctor's arms. Lorcan had "retired" early with Lieutenant Uzume; Devi assumed he was familiarizing her with his "personal log" by now. She slugged back the remainder of the drink, some viscous purple stuff she'd seen someone drinking earlier.

"Barkeep?" She spoke up, loud enough that the Ferengi should easily hear her; he kept scowling at the Dabo table with his arms folded across his ribcage. She whistled with a high enough pitch to be nearly inaudible to most humanoids. The Ferengi shrieked, covering his ears.

" Jeez, lady! That sound should be illegal. It's about the most annoying thing I've ever heard, but if it makes Quark squirm keep it up." The doctor grabbed a handful of latinum strips, and deftly tossed them to Devi. She caught them all, and raised an eyebrow at him.

He shrugged, with a devious grin, " Like I said, you made him squirm."

" Great. Everyone's making money but me." Quark was vigorously rubbing the inside of his enormous ear as he walked over. He managed to force a smile, " What can I do for you, ma'am?"

Devi thought again about Lorcan's lucky endeavor this evening, and glanced at the fistful of latinum.

" How much was the 'Vulcan Love Slave' program again?" she grinned.

[Reliant121]

Darel let out a carnal war cry as leapt over his cover and began the charge toward Teaos' team. Each member of Mikey's group, including Darel fired as they went, soon covering the fallen tree Teaos was hiding behind with a blanket of paint. The occasional return shot came and went, normally missing everyone in the team. He was surprised at the efficiency of these "paint guns". Quite effective, if non-lethal. Perhaps riot police on Cardassia prime could use a shipment of them. outfitted with something more undesirable than paint of course. perhaps Vole urine, he thought smiling as he fired off another barrage.

Just as it all looked so easy, another man popped up from a log to the side of the charge. Darel turned to fire, but it was too late. The man from Teaos' crew let loose his paint gun, splattering Darel to the floor, grasping his down below.

"Now i know what Teaos meant," He grimaced, throwing the paint ball gun to the side.

[Teaos]

With a high pitched whine the Ferret flew up into the air.

"Computer, remove ferrits" Teaos said quickly before another of the furry devils could attack him.

Across from him Mark quickly snapped up his weapon and fired blindly over the rock he was laying behind, the barrage of paint balls hitting their position made it impossible for either of them to move, the rest of their team lay "dead" around them, to affraid of being hit in the coming paint storm to move back to base.

***

"We have them!" Mikey cried as they advanced up the small ravine while the rest of his team provided cover fire "I want Teaos alive!" He called out to the crewmen with him.

He smiled as he pulled himself on on some long grass approaching the top of the ravine. Hearing a low rumbling sound he looked over his shoulder down the ravine, seeing nothing he went to pull himself up further when he heard one of his cry men swear next to him.

"Oh fuc-" He exclaimed before being claimed by a wall of water moving down the ravine.

***

"A flash flood?" Mark asked as he and Teaos crawled back toward their base to regroup with the rest of their team.

"I didnt see you coming up with any other ideas" Teaos said as he finally stood up and started jogging back to the rest of his team.

[Sionnach Glic]

"So," Commented Rochey as he crouched behind a large fallen tree next to Captain Fletcher and three various ensigns from the Paladin, watching the treeline for movement. "remind me again sir, exactly why are we doing this?"

"Because it's fun." Fletcher replied, waving two of the ensigns forward to take cover in a ditch ahead of them. Fletcher had decided to loop around the edges of the forrest and hit the opposing team in the flanks while the rest of the crew drew their attention. So far they'd encountered no resistance, but neither of the officers were about to be lulled into a false sense of security.

"Fun?"

"Yes, fun. You know, as in something you enjoy?"

"I know what fun is, sir. You really consider this fun?"

"Of course." Fletcher answered as the third ensign hurried forward and jumped into the ditch. They had to be near the enemy base now.

"You consider shooting each other with paint fun?"

"Yes."

"You consider shooting each other with paint that hurts to be fun?"

"Yes." The captain replied before vaulting over the log and running for the ditch himself. Rochey tried to figure out how that could possibly be construed as fun, but kept coming back to the same answer: these creatures were just weird. With a mental shrug, Rochey hopped over the log and ran for the ditch ahead, jumping into it just in time to be out of sight of a lieutenant he recognised as being from the Daystrom wandered out of the forrest and into view.

"Stay down." Fletcher said quietly, gesturing for the four other crewmen to stay out of sight. Luckily, the ditch they were in was shielded from view by a row of small shrubs. The opposing lieutenant had no idea they were there.

"Should we shoot him or see if he just walks past?" Rochey asked, checking to make sure his paintball gun was ready.

"Let's see what he does first." Fletcher answered, peering through the branches of a shrub at him. "We got this close without being spotted, no sense in blowing our cover now."

The Daystrom officer looked around for a moment and then, satisfied that no one was around, began walking obliviously straight towards that Paladin crew's hiding spot.

"Damn." Fletcher commented. "So much for that plan. Right, all of you, five rounds rapid, on my mark.......NOW!"
With a yell, all five crewmen stood up and unloaded almost two dozen rounds into the unfortunate officer, nearly all of which had been aimed at either his crotch or his head. At a range of just three metres nearly all of them hit. The lieutenant fell to the ground and clutched at his groin.

"He came from that direction," One of the ensigns commented. "there's a chance that's where their base might be."

"Right." Answered Fletcher. "Let's kick some ass." He paused for a moment and turned back to Rochey, grinning. "Having fun yet, commander?"

"Actualy sir," he replied, prodding the whimpering lieutenant with a foot. "I think I'm starting to see just why this game is fun."

[Mark]

"You see the enemy concentration in that direction, sir?" Mark whispered, and gestured with the point of his rifle threw the thick grass.

"I think I see where your going with this, Lieutenant" Teaos replied as the two lay on down in the foliage. "If they're guarding something, there must me something worth guarding."

Doing a quick inventory, Mark whispered "It looks like five of them sir, at least. They have excellent position and cover. The only way to get past them is to draw them out, and catch them in a crossfire. Any other tricks up your sleeve, sir?"

With a little grin Teaos replied "Mark, if I do all of your thinking for you, you'll never learn anything at all. This one is up to you. Impress me."

Raising an eyebrow, Mark replied with a completely neutral expression "Very well, sir. I have an idea........."

____________________________________________________________

Lt. Tucker, Pegasus' security chief was badly hung over. Hung over meant grouchy and less than focused, so imagine her surprise, when a stunningly beautiful, half naked Dabo girl came swishing into the clearing she was supposed to be defending with her team. While being a firm lover of men, Sara certainly would enjoy the occasional liason with the right woman as well, and this airhead who just walked into the middle of a paintwar CERTAINLY looked like the right woman, for this evenings entertainment. To her complete surprise, the Dabo girl looked around and stripped off the last of her gauzy clothing and with a last look around laid down in the tall grass. Some interesting moaning sounds started to eminate from the spot, warrenting Sara and her four ensigns to slowly break cover and creep forward to investigate. Moving forward, they converged on the spot where the Dabo girl should have been "enjoying" herself. Instead, all they found was a discarded scarf. Reaching down to retrieve it, Tucker stood up, holding the cloth and asked of nobody in particular, "What the hell?
______________________________________________________________

Rat...tat...tat.....tat....echoed from both sides of the glade, peppering the officers from Pegasus, sending more than one to the ground holding their manhoods.

Smirking, Teaos and Mark advanced on the hapless group, with Mark gesturing over his shoulder with his thumb, "I believe the penalty box is that way, Lieutenant."

Scowling, Lt Tucker groweled, "You cheated, you bastards. That's not fair."

Sniffing the air, Teaos replied, "We overcame and adapted Lieutanent. Maybe you need another drink."

Snickering Teaos and Mark advanced past team Pegasus' fallen position, while the "dead" team made their way to the exit.

"Do you think this is it, sir?" Mark asked.

"I doubt it, Mark." Teaos replied "If I know Mikey, he's not done yet."

[Grundig]

"Another," burbled Kleth as he slapped his empty glass on the table. The waitress had only just dropped the drink off at the table, and was still well within earshot of the klingon's gritty voice. She flashed a smile and retrieved the dripping glass. As she turned away Grathess grabbed her hand.

"Perhaps you'll give those scrawny legs a rest." Grathess looked the Bajoran over. "Bring us an ample supply of bloodwine, and I think I'll let you sit and listen to my stories."

She raised an eyebrow, and eyed the pungeant patrons with half a smile. She'd been on her feet for hours - Quark didn't like breaks - but her nose would rather she kept serving. "It's a deal!"

Behind the bar, she met up with Quark. He was wearing his formal dark green outfit - the one with the longest tails. "Tonight's guests are demanding quite a variety of refreshments," he said softly. "Thirty percent of any tips you recieve from those klingons."

"Fifteen."

"Twenty Five."

"Perhaps you'd like to sit on his lap yourself, Quark?"

"Very well, twenty."

"Twenty, and don't send me to that Romulan. At least klingons will tell you how they got their scars!"