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Someone can find Neelix's ass with both hands.
Much like the character of Wesley, who was strategically introduced to draw younger male viewers into the Star Trek universe, Nelix was introduced to appeal to the targeted "My Pretty Pony " / "Fantasy Fillies” enthusiasts crossover market.
Much like the character of Wesley, who was strategically introduced to draw younger male viewers into the Star Trek universe, Nelix was introduced to appeal to the targeted "My Pretty Pony " / "Fantasy Fillies” enthusiasts crossover market.
Kes and Naomi Wildman were the young girls who dressed him up and brushed his mane, etc…. IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
Neelix: "Pickled Kazon cabbage, covered with Klingon hot sauce...a gustatory delight.."
Paris: "And an olfactory nightmare."
"If Leiutenant Paris and I got into a fight, I would mop the floor with him! I would give him such a pounding he would beg for mercy! Why I would... He's right behind me, isn't he?"
At the final of the "Most Irritating Sci-Fi Character" contest, Neelix lets rip at Jar Jar Binks while Paris looks on. Wesley Crusher was prevented from entering because that would have been too easy.
In a sadistic mood, Paris tells Neelix that the scriptwriters have worked out how to bring Wesley Crusher on board.
Let me get this straight: Trumps's "hair plugs" surgery was inspired by Nelix's character?
Trump continues to hold campaign rallies for what seems like hundreds of years after the election is over.
If Neelix' hair starts to remind you of your toothbrush, it's time to get a new toothbrush.
Now that you think about it, when Nelix cooks, shouldn’t he wear a net on his whiskers or whatever those things are?
Talaxian Tai Chi included using facial movements, lots and lots facial movements.
Nelix, to self: What a DEAL! Lieutenant Paris just traded me this brand new Samsung Note 7 for a single day’s replicator rations. He acted like it was burning a hole in his pocket ….
Neelix: "PLEASE, Mr. Paris... There are FOUR more urinals you could be using."
Neelix responds to the 'But what about second breakfast?' quip.
It was only after taking a closer look that Tom realized that all the colors on Neelix' clothes weren't dye, but in fact dozens of food splotches acquired during his many years of sloppy cooking.
A...Q... Question Mark... Seven... Smiley Face...
"I Like Big Butts. I cannot lie."
Guess who's getting extra servings of leola root and beans? That's right, you are, mister!
'Posers, the Space Musical' didn't quite take off.
And who do you think was responsible for that clog last month? That's right.
Tom looks in disbelief as Nelix aruges with himself in a mirror.
And I woulda got away with it too if it weren't for you meddling kids.
Neelix: ''Is this a phaser, or are you just happy to see me?''
Tom: ''Don't keep grossly overestimating your charisma. No-one is happy to see you. This *is* a phaser.''
Tom could hardly believe it. It was actually possible for a Star Trek character to be worse than Wesley.
Thanks Mr. Paris, but I can wipe that myself.
Tom: ''...and remember to always stay in front of me while we are on the diplomatic mission to Triggerhappycos IV.''
Neelix: ''Of course! The Captain promoted me to Voyager's official Sentient Shield after all, whatever that means!''
As a backup career, Tom completed his correspondence course as a 'Talaxian Barber'. Unfortunately, Neelix needed a haircut every 48 weeks.
Paris: "What do you think, Nelix... Just a quick trim?"
Neelix: ''Why are you staring at me like that?''
Tom: ''I try to figure out what color your friggin' clothes are!''
Big Sneeze in 3...2...1...
Neelix: Just wait until I show you the secret sex tapes of Tom and B'Elanna I have!
Neelix: Just wait, when Star Trek Discovery comes out we won't be considered the worst series!
First, Neelix loved Kes.
Then, Tom loved Kes.
Then, Kes wasn't there, so...
Lt. Paris looks on as Nelix's pants drop to the floor , since Tom widened the waistline the night before.
Ecinemoos are in dire straits, but I can count on this!
cred ca mainile ascunse la spate arata nu neaparat ganduri ascunse ,acest gest il fac si eu si singurul motiv pentru care il fac este neirercdenea in mine si in ce am de spus , este o incercare de a evita sa ma joc cu mainile in timp ce vorbesc , o incercare de a evita emotiile
Seconds before a transporter accident generates Peerix
Banksy strikes again... IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
Neelix: ''Well, a Talaxian can't change his spots...''
Tom: ''I looked very closely. He really can't!''
From the creators of 'Dude! Where's my Starship!?' comes 'Beavis and Buttead... IN SPAAAACE'
The Kes Fanclub desperately needs help in their recruitment.
The spin-off series 'Snark Trek: Voyager' didn't exactly take off.
Neelix:: ''Pffft! Pffft! PFFFT!!! OK Tom, you were right. One CAN'T whistle after sucking on a slice of lemon!''
"You can't frighten us your sorcerers' ways, Lord Vader. This station is now the ultimate power in the universe!"
Oh, Tom. I feel for you. It must take a will of iron to see the back of the Neelix's head and not bash it to death...
Neelix: ''We are not afraid of any Kazons!''
Tom: ''Exactly!''
Neelix: ''And if they dare to attack us, Tom will fight them!''
Tom: ''Exact- wait, what!?''
Tom, to self: It's hard to believe that his species is so closely related to giraffes.
In an unfortunate coincidence, years ago, Tom had nick-named his penis “Little Nelix”.
Coming soon: a whole slew of juvenile fart jokes!
Neelix: ''Tom, I think there's something sticking on my back...''
Tom: ''It is! It is a piece of paper. It says 'Kick me!', written in Vulcan script.''
Neelix: ''Huh. It seems that Mr. Tuvok DOES have a sense of humor after all...''
A Talaxian Moon.
Turns out Tom was SO LAZY he wouldn’t go anywhere if he couldn’t “draft” in some one’s slipstream.
Turns out Tom was SO LAZY he wouldn’t walk anywhere if he couldn’t “draft” in some one’s slipstream.
Nelix, taunting: You go Lance Armstrong!
Tom: My word Neelix, what have you done to your hair?
Tom, smirking: No, Nelix. I am NOT laughing behind your back.
We'll always HAVE Paris.
The next instant, the crew recoiled in horror as Tom drew a knife and cut Neelix's throat.
Neelix: (farts)
Paris: Dammit, Neelix, what the hell did you eat?
There, right here. If I put the needle right there, no-one will find the puncture mark and his death will look like a heart attack.
If I stare long enough, I WILL drill a hole into Neelix's skull.
Tom wonders"what does Kes see in Neelix?"
Nelix: "And the winner is..., (opens the envelope) La La Land!"
In celebration of St. Laxee's Day, Nelix tried to attach "Kiss Me I'm Talaxian" pins on the entire Voyager crew. Paris was not amused.
Nelix: "Yeah... YOU think you have the market cornered on crappy sequels. Granted, Star Trek V was pretty bad. But you've NEVER seen the Talaxian cult classic "The Spicy Fern Fungus Trilogy." Especially Part III... They just MAILED that one in."
Paris: "Almost, Nelix... A little to the left. Just a bit more. Good. Now, take a small step forward... PERFECT!. Now, just hold still...
OK, Tuvak... Fire away."
Tom shows Neelix what a Cosmic Wedgie is.
Nelix: Tom, does this make my ass look big? Tom?
Tom : Nelix , I think you may have insulted that Klingon with
your Gagh . It's best served live.
Nelix : Kapla !!!!
Neelix: ''Tell me if my hair looks good from behind.''
Tom: ''Uh... Depends on your definition of 'good'...''
Neelix: "...and that Tom Paris... Let me tell you about HIM! Tom Paris is one pea brained, pompous, pretty boy turd-monger. He slings so much crap I need to wear a hat when I talk to him...
He's right behind me, isn't he?"


Copyright Graham Kennedy Page views : 29,331 Release date : 1 Apr 2017