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NASCARtographer Desperate to milk every last sent out of the once bountiful cash cow, Paramount unsuccessfully put their efforts into the family friendly but ill conceived "Star Trek On Ice."

Special Mention

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The Geek Tech on right: "Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!"
Guy in chair: "Oh, shut up."
Frankie Chestnuts Ensign 1: "It looks like the 'Tetris' game he was playing is still running."
Ensign 2: "Ooo, ooo... I love that game. Me next!"
Frankie Chestnuts Frozen Dude: "HEY! Shut that DAMN DOOR!! It's colder than a witch's nacelle out there!
Bird of Prey Man on the left: ''I am growing sick of being on a starship! Why can't I have an assignment on a space station, like this one here?''
Man on the right: ''What is so much better about a space station?''
Man on the left: ''Just look around! Look as this guy! Here is where all the cool people are!''
AJ I don't know what you think you're doing, but shooting this guy in the head seems overkill.
Frankie Chestnuts During the filming of "The Incredibles", a horrible accident occurred when Frozone's freeze ray malfunctioned.
NASCARtographer In retrospect, Starfleet Command regretted its rather poorly worded cancellation of the Psi 2000 Research Project when it issued the command to "Put it on Ice."
mwhittington Spock: Fascinating. Captain, it appears his 20 condoms of China White burst... all over the place.
Frankie Chestnuts Spock: "By Grabthar's Hammer!! That must have been SOME party!!"
Frozen Dude: "Hey, guys... Never give up... Never surrender. And please keep it down."
EMH_MkI Nimoy: Do you remember that time when I said I'll teach you how to do the Vulcan hand sign when hell freezes over?
Shatner: Yeah.
Nimoy: I lied.
mikey "Dude, that will never work. Your hair dryer isn't even plugged in!"
Bird of Prey ''Oh the irony! He froze to death while contemplating which package of frozen food he should thaw...''
mwhittington Spock: Fascinating. Captain, I do believe we found the powdered sugar that the chef complained was missing.
Frankie Chestnuts Ensign: "Gotta be the WORST case of dandruff I've ever seen."
Frankie Chestnuts Ensign: "Tough way to go... Death by Dandruff..."
Spock: "A little 'Head and Shoulders' would have gone a long way."
Bird of Prey Not on every planet the crew of the Enterprise is welcome. Sometimes the reception can be rather frosty.
Kogenta Learn this lesson Ensign, "Don't do cocaine."
ChaosKitty5000 Spock: It appears we need a larger hair dryer...
crewmember: Try taking the end cap off, it'll work better.
C. W. Perkins Spock: Fascinating, if I were a cannibal I'd be most impressed.
Crewman: What?
Spock: No trace of freezer burn.
Crewman: You really need a vacation, Mr. Spock.
Bird of Prey Man on the left: ''I think we'll need more than just a hair blower to thaw him up again...''
The Geek Tech on right: "According to these readings, Ensign Cokehead succumbed to..."
Tech on left: "A cocaine overdose?"
Tech in right: "... hypothermia."
Tech on left: "Oh! Uh... well... er... I just thought... you know, never mind."
The Geek Don't worry, everybody. Keith Richards survived his latest binge.
MLCoolJ To add insult to injury: not only is this man frozen over, he's still on hold with the HP call center.
DBB Set phasers to defrost.

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Copyright Graham Kennedy Page views : 873 Last updated : 1 Dec 2014