A minor way that Trek sucks
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A minor way that Trek sucks
One of the things I've noticed over the years is that Trek writers love to pick up on things that, to people who travel around in space, should be really, really basic and obvious... and treat them as if you're some sort of space genius to think of it.
Three examples of this, all from TNG :
Bouncing off the atmosphere.
In Coming of Age a kid steals a shuttle and buggers up the engine. It's on a collision course into a planet. Oh no! Only Picard realises that if you set just the right course the shuttle will bounce off the atmosphere and back into space. Picard is a genius! Even Commander Asshole Remmick goes a "Yes!" in celebration.
Only... this effect is extremely well known. In fact from the days of the first space flights right through to today's shuttle missions, they have to be incredibly careful when doing a re-entry to make sure they don't bounce off the atmosphere. This is like thinking somebody is a brilliant driver because he knows how to use the brake.
Gravity Slingshot.
In Booby Trap, the ship is trying to "drift" out of a dangerous asteroid belt, but doesn't have enough velocity. Oh no! So Picard heads in close to one of the big asteroids and whips by, getting a gravity boost. Riker talks about it afterwards like Picard powered the ship out by shining shunshie out of his asshole.
Only... once again, the idea of gaining a gravity boost like this dates back to the earliest days of space flight. Indeed I think it was suggested theoretically decades before the first real space flight. It's been used many times by various space probes, most famously by the Voyager and Pioneer probes.
The Picard Maneuver.
Faced with a dangerous adversary, Picard does "what any good helmsman would do"; he warps his ship in to point blank range. Since warp is faster than light then the adversary sees TWO ships now, one real and one an illusion as light is still arriving from the old position. Picard takes advantage of the confusion to fire all weapons at point blank range, winning the engagement. Riker comments adoringly "What any good helmsman would do... you did it FIRST!" Data later comments that there is no known counter to the Picard maneuver.
Only... well technically this one isn't a big deal yet only because we don't have combat in space or ships with FTL. But lightspeed delays and dealing with them are already perfectly common knowledge in space travel, and sci fi writers have been talking about how lightspeed lags would affect your picture of a battle for decades. In fact, even outside of combat Starfleet would have to CONSTANTLY be thinking about where ships really are as opposed to where they appear to be. It would be simple day to day reality for them.
Oh, and Data? No known counter to the Picard maneuver? How about you simply fire all weapons on the ship that's closest to you, since that's OBVIOUSLY the real one? Yeah Picard could, I suppose, be said to have had surprise on his side in the initial battle. But once the maneuver is known about, it's perfectly obvious which ship is real and which isn't. Okay in this particular case they didn't want to actually kill Picard... so they use the genius tactic of... locking a tractor beam on. Okay.... how does that stop him firing, exactly?
Of course they could also have just warped away at warp 9.6 for an hour. No way the Stargazer would be able to follow. Or they could have used phasers to disable the weapons without killing Picard. Chancy, but well within their capabilities. Or they could have put maximum power to the shields and just sat there and let his obsolete rustbucket fire until it ran out of ammo.
It's a horribly simple tactic, easily defeated and badly depicted.
Three examples of this, all from TNG :
Bouncing off the atmosphere.
In Coming of Age a kid steals a shuttle and buggers up the engine. It's on a collision course into a planet. Oh no! Only Picard realises that if you set just the right course the shuttle will bounce off the atmosphere and back into space. Picard is a genius! Even Commander Asshole Remmick goes a "Yes!" in celebration.
Only... this effect is extremely well known. In fact from the days of the first space flights right through to today's shuttle missions, they have to be incredibly careful when doing a re-entry to make sure they don't bounce off the atmosphere. This is like thinking somebody is a brilliant driver because he knows how to use the brake.
Gravity Slingshot.
In Booby Trap, the ship is trying to "drift" out of a dangerous asteroid belt, but doesn't have enough velocity. Oh no! So Picard heads in close to one of the big asteroids and whips by, getting a gravity boost. Riker talks about it afterwards like Picard powered the ship out by shining shunshie out of his asshole.
Only... once again, the idea of gaining a gravity boost like this dates back to the earliest days of space flight. Indeed I think it was suggested theoretically decades before the first real space flight. It's been used many times by various space probes, most famously by the Voyager and Pioneer probes.
The Picard Maneuver.
Faced with a dangerous adversary, Picard does "what any good helmsman would do"; he warps his ship in to point blank range. Since warp is faster than light then the adversary sees TWO ships now, one real and one an illusion as light is still arriving from the old position. Picard takes advantage of the confusion to fire all weapons at point blank range, winning the engagement. Riker comments adoringly "What any good helmsman would do... you did it FIRST!" Data later comments that there is no known counter to the Picard maneuver.
Only... well technically this one isn't a big deal yet only because we don't have combat in space or ships with FTL. But lightspeed delays and dealing with them are already perfectly common knowledge in space travel, and sci fi writers have been talking about how lightspeed lags would affect your picture of a battle for decades. In fact, even outside of combat Starfleet would have to CONSTANTLY be thinking about where ships really are as opposed to where they appear to be. It would be simple day to day reality for them.
Oh, and Data? No known counter to the Picard maneuver? How about you simply fire all weapons on the ship that's closest to you, since that's OBVIOUSLY the real one? Yeah Picard could, I suppose, be said to have had surprise on his side in the initial battle. But once the maneuver is known about, it's perfectly obvious which ship is real and which isn't. Okay in this particular case they didn't want to actually kill Picard... so they use the genius tactic of... locking a tractor beam on. Okay.... how does that stop him firing, exactly?
Of course they could also have just warped away at warp 9.6 for an hour. No way the Stargazer would be able to follow. Or they could have used phasers to disable the weapons without killing Picard. Chancy, but well within their capabilities. Or they could have put maximum power to the shields and just sat there and let his obsolete rustbucket fire until it ran out of ammo.
It's a horribly simple tactic, easily defeated and badly depicted.
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. SET a man on fire, and you will keep him warm for the rest of his life...
Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
Something that just irked me about the movie last night.
Kirk lands on the mining drill on Vulcan. Pulls his helmet off, pushes back his hood, and sees a Romulan open the topside hatch. What does he do? He ignores his phaser, with which he could have stood there and kept them pinned down, but no. He charges forward and attacks a physically superior enemy with his HELMET!?
Kirk lands on the mining drill on Vulcan. Pulls his helmet off, pushes back his hood, and sees a Romulan open the topside hatch. What does he do? He ignores his phaser, with which he could have stood there and kept them pinned down, but no. He charges forward and attacks a physically superior enemy with his HELMET!?
They say that in the Army,
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
- Lighthawk
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
Well we wouldn't have wanted common sense and sound tactics to get in the way of a good melee struggle, now would we?Mark wrote:Something that just irked me about the movie last night.
Kirk lands on the mining drill on Vulcan. Pulls his helmet off, pushes back his hood, and sees a Romulan open the topside hatch. What does he do? He ignores his phaser, with which he could have stood there and kept them pinned down, but no. He charges forward and attacks a physically superior enemy with his HELMET!?
Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
This one I can forgive.Bouncing off the atmosphere.
In Coming of Age a kid steals a shuttle and buggers up the engine. It's on a collision course into a planet. Oh no! Only Picard realises that if you set just the right course the shuttle will bounce off the atmosphere and back into space. Picard is a genius! Even Commander Asshole Remmick goes a "Yes!" in celebration.
Only... this effect is extremely well known. In fact from the days of the first space flights right through to today's shuttle missions, they have to be incredibly careful when doing a re-entry to make sure they don't bounce off the atmosphere. This is like thinking somebody is a brilliant driver because he knows how to use the brake.
In a crisis, people who are not trained for that particular crisis usually do not think of the obvious.
And the "yes" could have been simply because the kid succeeded in the attempt, because as a non-pilot, Remmick probly wasn't sure how to bounce of the atmosphere (as in what angle), nor if the kid actually was at the right angle.
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
Well, theres the infection of the Enterprise D in Contagion. It takes Data dying, wiping his own system and rebooting from protected backup in order for Geordi to realise they could do the same with the computer on the Enterprise.
And the episode where Pulalski had to explain to one of her staff what a splint was (I don't recall which episode).
As for Star Trek, if that silly bugger hadn't pulled his cord too late and got himself toasted, could the 3 of them killed off the Romulans quickly enough to destroy the drill in time?
And the episode where Pulalski had to explain to one of her staff what a splint was (I don't recall which episode).
As for Star Trek, if that silly bugger hadn't pulled his cord too late and got himself toasted, could the 3 of them killed off the Romulans quickly enough to destroy the drill in time?
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
I think the complaint was more towards how it took Picard to think of it (everyone else was ready to consider the kid a goner) and then they praised Picard's quick thinking. I can grant that the kid might not have known about it, but of everyone on the bridge, the only person who knew you could bounce off the atmosphere was the captain? I think the Ent would be in serious need of a new helmsmen then.stitch626 wrote:This one I can forgive.Bouncing off the atmosphere.
In Coming of Age a kid steals a shuttle and buggers up the engine. It's on a collision course into a planet. Oh no! Only Picard realises that if you set just the right course the shuttle will bounce off the atmosphere and back into space. Picard is a genius! Even Commander Asshole Remmick goes a "Yes!" in celebration.
Only... this effect is extremely well known. In fact from the days of the first space flights right through to today's shuttle missions, they have to be incredibly careful when doing a re-entry to make sure they don't bounce off the atmosphere. This is like thinking somebody is a brilliant driver because he knows how to use the brake.
In a crisis, people who are not trained for that particular crisis usually do not think of the obvious.
And the "yes" could have been simply because the kid succeeded in the attempt, because as a non-pilot, Remmick probly wasn't sure how to bounce of the atmosphere (as in what angle), nor if the kid actually was at the right angle.
- Graham Kennedy
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
It should have been utterly obvious to anybody who, for instance, is a trained shuttle pilot. Which should be just about any bridge officer. Riker is meant to be the best pilot on the ship and he never thought of it. Neither did Data.stitch626 wrote:In a crisis, people who are not trained for that particular crisis usually do not think of the obvious.
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
Well... it is Kirk, who in the movie is not known for being the most rational of people.Mark wrote:Something that just irked me about the movie last night.
Kirk lands on the mining drill on Vulcan. Pulls his helmet off, pushes back his hood, and sees a Romulan open the topside hatch. What does he do? He ignores his phaser, with which he could have stood there and kept them pinned down, but no. He charges forward and attacks a physically superior enemy with his HELMET!?
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
I seem to recall the phaser being knocked out of his hand at some point prior to that. Or am I wrong?RK_Striker_JK_5 wrote:Well... it is Kirk, who in the movie is not known for being the most rational of people.Mark wrote:Something that just irked me about the movie last night.
Kirk lands on the mining drill on Vulcan. Pulls his helmet off, pushes back his hood, and sees a Romulan open the topside hatch. What does he do? He ignores his phaser, with which he could have stood there and kept them pinned down, but no. He charges forward and attacks a physically superior enemy with his HELMET!?
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
Obviously reboot Kirk, though - Kirk prime would have had to have torn his shirt.
I can't stand nothing dull
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
I agree with GK in principle, but I can forgive some of the particulars. I rave like a madman at the "idiocy" I see depicted when a sailboat turns in close hard and then gets behind the wind, but the man on the rudder fails to warn "prepare to gibe!" I mean, it's so damned obvious to any buffoon with half a monkey's brain that before you turn in close, you warn your mates about the free yard which is about to sweep the deck.
Hmmm.... or not, if it's not your area of interest...
Even more basic, I've seen movies/shows depicting the Age of Sail which go on to use the term "ship" to describe a two-masted vessel, or one which wasn't fully square-rigged. I've even seen documentary programs call galleons "ships." These usages are so obviously and glaringly incorrect as to be ludicrous... but there they are.
I guess my point is that the vast majority of the 'Trek fanbase is scientifically enlightened, if not erudite; but the responsibility of the writing is to whoever may be watching, no whoever is probably watching, and aiming at the LCD among the two. Sure, it wouldn't kill them to do a bit of research and get things right where it wouldn't affect the story - but the writing of the story must take precedence to scientific accuracy.
Hmmm.... or not, if it's not your area of interest...
Even more basic, I've seen movies/shows depicting the Age of Sail which go on to use the term "ship" to describe a two-masted vessel, or one which wasn't fully square-rigged. I've even seen documentary programs call galleons "ships." These usages are so obviously and glaringly incorrect as to be ludicrous... but there they are.
I guess my point is that the vast majority of the 'Trek fanbase is scientifically enlightened, if not erudite; but the responsibility of the writing is to whoever may be watching, no whoever is probably watching, and aiming at the LCD among the two. Sure, it wouldn't kill them to do a bit of research and get things right where it wouldn't affect the story - but the writing of the story must take precedence to scientific accuracy.
I can't stand nothing dull
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
I got the high gloss luster
I'll massacre your ass as fast
as Bull offed Custer
Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
Sonic Glitch wrote:I seem to recall the phaser being knocked out of his hand at some point prior to that. Or am I wrong?RK_Striker_JK_5 wrote:Well... it is Kirk, who in the movie is not known for being the most rational of people.Mark wrote:Something that just irked me about the movie last night.
Kirk lands on the mining drill on Vulcan. Pulls his helmet off, pushes back his hood, and sees a Romulan open the topside hatch. What does he do? He ignores his phaser, with which he could have stood there and kept them pinned down, but no. He charges forward and attacks a physically superior enemy with his HELMET!?
Phaser got knocked out of his hand after the initial engagement with the helmet. Almost like he forgot it was there at first.
They say that in the Army,
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
the women are mighty fine.
They look like Phyllis Diller,
and walk like Frankenstein.
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
I almost feel that sometimes that once a level of technological....ease enters our society (for example, I have a microwave where I can cook packeted curries if i wanted to) we become heavily dependent on it and lose either basic skills or knowledge. Using that earlier example, I can put a frozen packet with a meal into microwave for 4/5 minutes and bish bash bosh, done. Now I'd have no idea whatsoever how to physically cook it. I see no reason why someone can't simply forget based on lack of usage or lack of importance in every day society.
However, I think that more than just one person (IE, Picard) should remember basic physics principles. The navigator or helmsman for one should have a pretty good idea.
However, I think that more than just one person (IE, Picard) should remember basic physics principles. The navigator or helmsman for one should have a pretty good idea.
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
The Picard maneouver is one I too was always iffy about. No one really thought to use their warp drive for tactical purposes before Picard came along?
Though I never thought that bouncing off the atmosphere was an obvious solution, to be honest.
Though I never thought that bouncing off the atmosphere was an obvious solution, to be honest.
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Re: A minor way that Trek sucks
I don't mind the audience not knowing these things. What bothers me is that the characters all act like Picard is some sort of godlike genius to think of it, when it should be basic knowledge to them.
With the microwave curry thing... if a bunch of frat boys were standing around a broken microwave and one says "you know you can just BOIL rice instead of microwaving it" and they all go "wow!"... yeah, that's believable, kinda. But if the same thing happens with a bunch of professional chefs, you go "they're supposed to know this stuff!"
With the microwave curry thing... if a bunch of frat boys were standing around a broken microwave and one says "you know you can just BOIL rice instead of microwaving it" and they all go "wow!"... yeah, that's believable, kinda. But if the same thing happens with a bunch of professional chefs, you go "they're supposed to know this stuff!"
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. SET a man on fire, and you will keep him warm for the rest of his life...