My second short on DITL.

[Deepcrush]

Beasts of Men. A twisted race, far removed from humanity. Their hordes once a burden on the globe, now a world power. They have come together. Joined in sword and shield. Protecting their lands more fiercely then ever. Their little ones, ones who can pass often for human, guard their borders. Rangers and hunters prowl and stalk. Like all rising powers, there is a golden age which spurs. For the Beasts, that time is now. This age has seen the Beasts grow, grow like never before. Their numbers beyond the count of mortal men. Their power that of the gods of old. What were once scattered tribes, now a nation. A great nation.

Centuries go by and with every passing year their world grows smaller. The nations outside their borders reach for new lands. East, South and West. In the deep south, small kingdoms of the lesser humans war over petty lands. All stretching out for more. To the west, a noble human empire had made its home. Not so greedy, but still powerful and great in its own way. To the far east, across the dead lands was the realm of evil. Also powerful and much more greedy then any of the lesser humans. These powers have grown and reached to show their strength. The great fortress city of the Beasts has grown with them. Their work never finished, never ending. The Beasts carved power straight from the mountain itself. Who else could have made such a claim.

They started with caves and tunnels. Then began their fortress craft. Every stone taken from the inside is turned to help build on the outside. Now, five hundred years later. It is a castle built to the sky. Starting nearly a thousand feet above sea level. The Beast Capital raises another three thousand feet from its base. Level upon level upon level. Cut out of the west facing of the mountain. Great mines, mills, masonries and foundries churn day and night. The work never stops, never rests. Not for a single day or night. Nor even in the great storms and blistering summer suns. Never!

Sayloth walked his capital, his people's glory. Stopping on a bridge that spanned one of the three rivers that flowed through the city. Fresh water raced down the canals his people had built. These canals fed the city from the snow covered mountain tops. Bringing life too their crops and herds. His eyes rolled down the mountain side. Roads and walkways crisscrossed the great fortress from top to bottom. A city over half a mile tall. Stretching some six miles wide and tunneled over three miles through the mountain to the other side. Grey stone as far as the eye could see. Even more so for what one's eyes couldn't see. Low cast clouds and mist often blocking the view. Walls, each a hundred feet tall and thirty feet thick marked the different levels. The top of each wall linked to the base of the next one with crossways. Twenty eight levels completed so far; Sayloth admired his work.

His vision was nearly complete. He had just one wish for his capital; to be the greatest city of the world, for his people to have somewhere to call home. His builders lacked the art that seemed common among the lesser humans. No fancy forms and columns. No great shapes to stand out. Here, the Beasts built forms to fit their functions. The lesser humans had their reasons. But as Sayloth found it. They took to long to build. Everything had to be slow and expensive. Sayloth wasn't willing to spend the time. This time next year he would have fifty thousand workers on the other side of the mountain. He had ten thousand already there laying the ground work. Soon, Sayloth would expand his city. Soon enough the east facing would match the west.

Sayloth looked up behind him towards the palace, his palace. Of all the grey stone of the city, the palace was crimson red-a beautiful home too call his own. In truth he had always felt strange about it, such a huge place built for one person; it seemed such a waste of space. He had never wanted it, but his advisors had convinced him that it would help to show strength to visitors from other kingdoms. Give foreign leaders a place to stay when they came. Sayloth would rather sleep in the barracks with his personal guard legion, so he did. If it was good enough for all of them, then it was good enough for him. Why should he have a life better than that of the men who served him? They do the hard work and he knows this. Sayloth could remember his own time in the foundries, beating ore into steel to make armor and weapons. Much the same as his personal guards now wore.

His guards stood in rigid place as he passed. The palace legion and their armor stood out against the palace's red stone. They were clad head to toe in steel armor that shown bright as silver with trim the of purest white. A white mane arched down their great helms that lead to their white cloaks trimmed with silver. In there hands rest six foot tall Voulges and tower shields. Across their back lay Zweihanders, should they ever lose use of their Voulges.

[Monroe]

Awesome job establishing scene. You should continue the piece

[Deepcrush]

I'm working on that now. I was just hoping for feedback. Haven't really gotten any so I'm at a loss as to any problems I might have.

[Monroe]

I'm working on that now. I was just hoping for feedback. Haven't really gotten any so I'm at a loss as to any problems I might have.

Yeah I decided best way to get feed back for my Elenir piece is to check out other's works. *cough*cough*