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|MR. WORF||The reaction to seeing the sign saying : The Sonic Shower Is Out Of Order Until Further Notice .
Signed : Capt. Archer
|MR. WORF||What do you mean we have to go back and clean the garbage disposal again !!!?????|
|Mikey||"How do you know he's a king?"
" 'E must be a king... 'e 'asn't got shit all over 'im."
|MR. WORF||Honey ! Don't be sad , I guess The Cellular Expansion Factor was a little to much.|
|Bird of Prey||Archer: "You really should ask Dr. Phlox to give you something for your flakey skin. On an unrelated note, this cereals you brought me from your planet are delicious! Are those corn flakes?"
Jamin: "Not exactly...."
|stevewd||Of course we look like hell, we've been out partying all night.|
|Bird of Prey||"Klingons? We have nothing in common with them! Well, except that we too don't like baths..."|
|Frankie Chestnuts||Jamin: “Unguent... we need unguent.”
Nadet: “Or possibly salve.”
|Chromedome||Please do not park on the double yellow lines.|
|Chromedome||"Look, Ma, it's easy. Just pick which kind of bread you want, 6 inch or 12 inch. Then pick what meat you want, choose some salad to go with it. Then at the end give them this voucher to get a free cookie and let them scan your Subway card."
"It seems very complicated. Couldn't we just go to Nando's instead?"
|Miss Marple||Wait a minute -is that Jumpin' Jack Flash with a spike right thru his head?!?!|
|Miss Marple||Wait a minute -is that Jumpin' Jack Flash with a spike right thru his head?!?!
Ok. It's all right now, in fact, it's a gas!
|MR. WORF||Honey ! Don't be upset , they just missed two small areas of your face with French's® Mustard .|
|Bird of Prey||"Sorry Mom, but the sign here says that the face painting event is only supposed to be for little children..."|
|Cyrus Ramsay||"Looking on the bright side, nobody will park on her head."|
|EMH_MkI||The one time Harry Kim didn't walk into sickbay...|
|EMH_MkI||Who pushed the big red button that said "Do not push?" Anybody?|
|EMH_MkI||"Does my breath stink? Because when I do this *exhales* she does this."|
|EMH_MkI||Archer: We've received your distress signal. How may we be of assistance?
"We want your garbage."
Archer: Perhaps you need medical attention? Food?
"We want your garbage."
Archer: Maybe... you'd like-
"We want your garbage."
Archer: Get off my starship.
|EMH_MkI||Marriage counseling in the 22nd century sure took a turn for the worst...|
|Chromedome||These are the Ugly Sisters from the Starfleet Christmas pantomime|
|Chromedome||X Factor hopefuls await their turn on stage|
|Chromedome||"Ma! Ma! I want ridges like that Klingon, Ma! Pleeeease."|
|Danish32||And the moral of our story? Never get a Tattoo from a drunk Cardassian.|
|Bird of Prey||"We would like to file a complaint. This paint we bought here starts crumbling away very fast."
"Well, it's supposed to be paint for walls, not your face!"
|The Geek||To save money as ratings tumbled, the Make Up dept. resorted to fence paint sprayed at 4100psi.|
|AdmiralM||"please somebody by them some soap for Christmas"|
|Bird of Prey||Guy: "Please tell me about that concept that is very basic to your people, but completely alien to us!"
Archer: "Uh... You mean love?"
Guy: "No. I mean bathing!"
|The Geek||"CUT! MAKEUP!"|
|The Geek||Jamin: "I have a mole?"|
|Chromedome||"Isn't this better than being on Babylon 5?"|
|Bird of Prey||"I am sorry Ma, but this is the casting call for 'Mudd's Women', not 'mud women'."|
|EMH_MkI||Someone told us the phaser range doubled as a tanning salon.|
|EMH_MkI||We wished we took up his offer for a dermal analgesic!|
|EMH_MkI||The aftermath of someone putting a mistletoe under the warp reactor...|
|PegasusJF||Multi-year recipients of Santa Claus' coal.|
|Cyrus Ramsay||"Is this the audition for 'Star Trek: Braveheart'?"|
|PegasusJF||These people are traumatized, TRAUMATIZED that the "It's a good day to dye" caption didn't get on the list last month.|
|PegasusJF||Someone tell these people what Christmas is all about STAT!|
|EMH_MkI||Space hobos... in SPAAA-|
|EMH_MkI||Starfleet instituted a 'no restrooms near the warp reactor' policy shortly thereafter.|
|Frankie Chestnuts||Archer: “Good God... what happened?
Jamin: She'd been drinking too much eggnog, snd we begged her not to go.
But she forgot her medication, and she staggered out the door into the snow.
When we found her Christmas morning. At the scene of the attack.
She had hoof-prints on her forehead, and incriminating Claus marks on her back.
|Frankie Chestnuts||Jamin: “Gesundheit...|
|Miss Marple||We dress like this to try to divert your gaze from our poor dental hygiene practices.|
|Miss Marple||At Burning Man, the Reno emergency services departments always tried to staff with “client sensitive providers”.|
|Chromedome||"If only we'd got the Shakespeare gig ..."|
|Chromedome||"Look on the bright side, at least we get paid for this."
"It's not enough."
|Chromedome||"You mean this ISN'T a fancy dress party?"|
|Chromedome||"Yeah, I guess we pissed off the makeup department."|
|Bird of Prey||"What is this.... skin care... you talk of?? I don't think our culture is familiar with that concept..."|
|Frankie Chestnuts||Jamin: “Could you spare some water?”
Nadet: “We are just a wee bit thirsty.”
|Frankie Chestnuts||...but the Republicans claimed we wouldn’t lose our insurance because of our pre-existing condition.|
|Frankie Chestnuts||Welcome to Trump’s America.|
|The Geek||METH: Never even once.|
|MLCoolJ||And this, kids, is why you wear sunscreen when you go outside.|
|Copyright Graham Kennedy||Page views : 419||Release date : 30 Nov -0001|