 |
| Name | Caption |
| EMH_MkI | T'Pol: Did you try rebooting it? Archer: At least a dozen times. T'Pol: Did you unplug and replug it back in? Archer: That was the second thing we did. T'Pol: How and WHY on Earth would you operatate a starship to on Windows 95? Archer: *eyes Tucker* |
| Name | Caption |
| PegasusJF | Johnathan Archer, Captain, Savior of Earth, micromanager. |
| PegasusJF | Archer: Look, I got one job on this lousy ship, it's stupid, but I gotta do it! |
| EMH_MkI | T'Pol: I've found the problem. You're still running Windows 2100. And it has never been updated. Archer: Malcolm.... Reed: *ducks behinde console* |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Archer: "It's alright, Commander... Calm down. Just tell me... Who gave you the haircut?" |
| Bird of Prey | Archer: ''Are you playing Tetris at work again?'' T'Pol: ''This isn't Tetris. It is a Vulcan mind training program that -'' Archer: ''To me it looks very much like Tetris!'' |
| Cyrus Ramsay | "How come Jolene can read her lines of this monitor while we have to learn ours?" "Scott, your're the only one who ISN'T using a monitor." |
| Gambit36 | Archer: "Why are you viewing footage from that bridge security camera?" T'Pol: "It is apparently being used for a highly illogical waste of talent called a 'Caption Competition'... |
| Bird of Prey | T'Pol: ''Captain, why have you replaced the buttons of my console with piano keys?'' Archer: ''We are about to make first contact with an alien species, and I need you to play a series of five tones.'' |
| Bird of Prey | Archer: ''Where is the 'any key'? Really!? That is your question? It simply means that it doesn't matter which key you press to proceed, only that you press one.'' T'Pol: ''A software that is actually encouraging random button smashing is illogical!'' |
| Bird of Prey | T'Pol: ''Captain, what was the password again?'' Archer: ''vUlcAns-R-5tup1d!'' |
| Chromedome | "Captain, I have hacked into Trip's Amazon account as you ordered. What do I do now?" "Order him the Big Norgs Deluxe Inflatable Doll." "Hmmmm, it appears that he has already done that, Captain!" "What?" "Yes, on the same order as a stirrup pump, a yak and a vat of Nutella*." "No wonder they call him Trippy!" * = To avoid product placement bias, note that other nut based spreads are available! |
| Chromedome | "Yes Captain, you put the jack of hearts on the queen of spades and then the six of clubs goes over here ... isn't that obvious? "Ummm." |
| Niall Johnson | Trip, you taped over the Bridge log with you Risa vacation video? |
| Niall Johnson | Call Microsoft. I did not want to upgrade to Windows 10. |
| Chromedome | "I am unable to detect any sign that Commander Tucker has any kind of dress sense." |
| Bird of Prey | ''T'Pol's anthropological log, day 465. The alpha silverback tries to groom me again.'' |
| AJ | Yes, captain, the minecraft world is now officially larger than the known universe. |
| Frankie Chestnuts | Archer: "T'Pol, please tell me... Who are these birds, and why are they angry?" |
| Dunharrow | Well, Cntl-Alt-Delete didn't work |
| Frankie Chestnuts | T'Pol: "You really can't fathom how difficult this is to do with you hovering over my shoulder like that." Archer: "I considered sitting on your lap, but I thought that would be even MORE disturbing." |
| Miss Marple | Archer, to self: Well, I PROBABLY won't get beaten up over here. |
| EMH_MkI | Archer: Alright, T'pol. Let's show them we mean business. Release the kraken! |
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