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Caption Competition

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19 Jun 2011

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Winner

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Mr. President Doctor: "With Captain Janeway dead, who will be the ship's psycho-bitch-from-hell now? (turns to see Seven of Nine) Ah, contestant number one!"

Special Mention

Name Caption
sentinel64 Doc: So Seven, this new UV bed will help with the vitamin D dificiency.
Seven: Yes, and will assist in my domination of the Alpha Quadrant.
Doc: Say again?
Seven: While the captain is in there, I am gaining all the secrets of the Alpha quadrant's defenses.
Doc: And how is it going.
Seven: Well.... so far I have over 47 ways... to make coffee.
Doc: You just might succeed... if you start up a coffee franchise. You might want to call it... Starbucks.
Frankie Chamber EMH: "For our next lesson in "Socialization", we are going to work on mating rituals."
Seven: "Right here in the Captain's quarters?"
EMH: "That's part of today's lesson... Surreptitious Teenage Behavior."
nerd86 Now with the Captain out of the way the ship will belong to the machines!
PegasusJF Seven: We thank you very sweetly for doing it so neatly.
You've killed her so completely that we thank you very sweetly.
PegasusJF Seven: But we've got to verify it legally to see...
EMH: To see?
Paris: If she...
Kim: is morally, ethic'ly
Tuvok: Spiritually, physically
Torres: Positively, absolutely
ALL: Undeniably DEAD!!!!
Mr. President Doctor: "Now with the Captain sedated, command of the ship falls to me."
Seven: "Do you hear a knocking?"
Doctor: "Um...no..."
jg The Doctor: I'm just saying that maybe you shouldn't use the Captain as a red shirt torpedo.
Seven: Why not? Isn't it Starfleet tradition to use redshirts as torpedos.
The DoctorL It was tradition, But that was when random security personel wore them. Now we use those wearing yellow.
jg Doctor: I keep thinking we forgot something.
Seven: I believe we didn't turn on Ensign Kim's stasis tube.
Docotr: That's not it, i don't plan on turning on his stasis tube.
Bird of Prey EMH: 'I told her that sleeping in this chamber for one night will make her look twenty years younger.'
Seven: 'And how is this supposed to work?'
EMH: 'I just hope for the placebo effect.'
Frankie Chestnuts EMH: "The captain has had difficulty sleeping-"
Janeway: "Doctor..."
EMH: "...so I eliminated coffee from her diet-"
Janeway: "DOCTOR!"
EMH: "...and am having here sleep in this sound isolation chamber."
Janeway: "LET ME OUT OF HERE!"
EMH: "...and I am proud to say I haven't heard a peep out of her in 15 hours!"
Frankie Chestnuts EMH: "...and then we reduce the unit down to the size of a suppository. It will allow you to smuggle the captain aboard the alien ship."
Janeway: "Correct, wait... what was that again?"
RedDwarfian EMH: Seven, when you came in here, did you notice a sign outside the cargo bay that said "Dead Captain Storage"?
nerd86 EMH: Did you kill the Captain?
Seven: Yes.
EMH: Well, it's good we cleared that up. Would you care for some tea?
Seven: Love some.
*casually stroll away*
Rylan Sato Doctor: "Seven, precisely how many times has the captain died?"
Seven: "Forty-seven."
DBB Seven: If I understand the mythology correctly, we should drive a stake into her heart now, while she sleeps, before she rises again to feed on the living.
Mr. President "These new Soylent Green boxes are really hard to open."
Mikey "Yes, Doctor, I do believe that the captain's grave is the appropriate place to begin my dance lessons."
Mikey "Now, Seven? Now, we do the same thing tonight that we do every night... TRY TO TAKE OVER THE QUADRANT!"
Captain Redbeard Excellent work, Doctor. The fart containment pod is functioning within expected parameters.
Frankie Chestnuts EMH: "Well... I've finally got her asleep."
Seven: "How did you manage?"
EMH: "I tried warm milk, reading poetry aloud to her, replays of "Lost"... Nothing worked... I eventually hit her with a Louisville Slugger."
Seven: "And she fell asleep?"
EMH: "Sleep... Coma... Really the same outcome."
Bird of Prey Snow White and the Seven of Nine.
Bird of Prey EMH: 'Now it's just you and me, Seven...'
Seven: 'Computer, deactivate Emergengy Medical Hologram.'
EMH: 'Aw, Sev-'
nerd86 EMH: Well, she's got the 'Sleeping' down, but where's the 'Beauty'?
Seven: Right here.
Captain Feedback Are you crazy!?! If I open the box my Janeway figure will lose half its value!

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© Graham & Ian Kennedy Page views : 15,237 Last updated : 19 Jun 2011